Top 10... - December 4, 2015

Trainwreck: 10 of the film's funniest lines
by James
by James hmv London, Bio "Like the legend of the Phoenix, I've just eaten a whole packet of chocolate HobNobs..." Editor,

Trainwreck: 10 of the film's funniest lines

Amy Schumer's star has been rising steadily in recent years, making the transition from stand-up comedy to television with appearances in shows like 30 Rock and Curb Your Enthusiasm before earning herself more regular roles in shows like Delocated and Lena Dunham's Girls, as well as appearing regularly on A Different Spin with Mark Hoppus alongside the Blink-182 frontman. She is best known these days however for her sketch show Inside Amy Schumer, showcasing the comedian's offbeat and often edgy comic writing talents.

Earlier this year her career's upward trajectory took the next logical step with the cinematic release of her first feature film, Trainwreck, written by and starring Schumer herself under the watchful eye of director Judd Apatow. Essentially, Trainwreck is a sort of semi-autobiographical romantic comedy (its writer has described the plot as being “about 30%” real life), with Schumer playing a character also called Amy, only the fictional version works as a writer for a men's magazine and has something of a phobia about romantic commitment.

As you'll see from the beginning of the film, this stems back to her childhood experiences of her parents' divorce, with her father drilling into the young Amy the idea that monogamy is unrealistic. It's a piece of questionable advice that she's clearly taken to heart and the early stages of the film see her go through a number of dates and sexual partners, all the while drinking heavily and generally shunning any kind of responsibility.

However, all that begins to change when she is assigned to write a feature on a prominent sports doctor named Aaron Conners (Bill Hader). Amy finds herself falling for him, but her heavy drinking and history of sexual proclivity causes some friction between the pair.

The film includes some surprisingly good acting turns for NBA star LeBron James, who plays himself as Aaron's best friend, as well as WWE wrestler John Cena, who appears in a hilarious scene as one of Amy's dates. The film's cast also includes Brie Larson, Tilda Swinton and Ezra Miller, while there are also appearances from Ferris Bueller star Matthew Broderick, tennis ace Chris Evert, former Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo and Miami Heat forward Amar'e Stoudemire, all of whom appear as themselves while staging an intervention try and persuade Aaron to give Amy another chance.

You can find the trailer for Trainwreck below, beneath that we've picked out ten of the film's most hilarious quotes...



[Amy to her sister]

“Ooh, I like Tom's sweater. Does he teach computer in a church basement?”

[Amy commenting on Oli's extraordinarily large penis]

“Have you ever f***ed anyone before? Where are they buried?”

[John Cena's character, Steven, on being told he looks like Mark Wahlberg]

“Mark Wahlberg? Me?? Mark Wahlberg is like 150 pounds, I'm 250 pounds lean! I look like Mark Wahlberg ate Mark Wahlberg!”

[More John Cena]

“Okay, Koko B. Ware, you know what? You're being an asshole! Alright? You know what I do with assholes? I lick 'em!”


[Amy's dad to a young Amy]

“What about a doll where your friend's playing with a doll and he needs you to, you know, kinda man up with the other doll? You don't even wanna play with that doll but you do it cause your friend's playing with that doll and you don't want to sit there and look at the other doll unattended. So that's why me and mom are getting divorced.”


[LeBron James to Aaron]

"We watching Downton Abbey later? Listen, I'm watching it tonight, because I'm not going to go to practice and all the guys are talking about it and I'm left out."

[Homeless guy to Amy about her 'walk of shame' outfit]

“What happened? Did church let out early?”

[Tilda Swinton's magazine editor to one of her writers]

“Nikki, I want you to research whether garlic makes semen taste any different.”

[Amy when Nikki asks her if she was drunk last night]

“No, I had like two drinks. Three, max. Four, now that I'm tallying...”


[Nikki to Amy when Aaron calls her just a few hours after they slept together]

“Hang up, he's obviously, like, sick or something. You know what? I'm calling the police.”

Trainwreck Judd Apatow

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